To MC...

[Do Do]

Hello MC,

Guess I'm not the one who has enough experience regarding family matters to consult, give you advices in these grievous time you're going through.

...

But from the standpoint of a person who has [or can afford to spend] a lot of free time to observe "the world" and dwell [nghĩ quẩn] on all kinds of incidents/situations... I'd like to share with you my thoughts.

Tragic and unfortunate/unfair as it may be [in your case], there are many many others out there who probably suffered even worse [than you]. It never seem they could overcome their/our burdens/hardship; but they/we all did--eventually.

With all due respect to L, he was a grownup, and was on his way to have his own life/family away from you [as most American adult would] already. I can only imagine your pain regarding the loss of your beloved son. But as an heartless bystander/observer, i'd just like to remind you again that L was an independent matured adult who would likely spend a lot of time with his own "friends" than with family [as most American would]. Nói dễ hiểu hơn, đa số lớn lên ở Hoa Kỳ sẽ rời xa cha mẹ/gia đình, để tự xây dựng tương lai, "gia đình riêng" của họ. Cha Mẹ không được xem là "Immediate Family" nữa, mà chỉ là "Họ Hàng" mà thôi.

I hope you did not take too much offense reading the above statement. But [if it helped you at all] just think of it as L just started out on his own, and will take a long time away from you [and his siblings], to find his own ways. Nhiều người chỉ về thăm Cha Mẹ vào những dịp lễ lạc; có người mấy năm mới thu xếp để tụ họp lại với gia đình, thậm chí còn chưa có cơ hội đưa con cháu về gặp mặt ông bà...

In my opinion, your utmost concern right now should be what you have--your present [and future]: your daughter and youngest son. Mourning is a noble [and understandable] phase any loving Mother would go through. But [over]mourning a son who already passed on, to have a negative effect on a son who has not matured [and still need your nurturing]... is something I'd advised against.

Instead of spending too much time grieving L, you should try even harder to embrace and love Út more. L would like that to happen also. And that is the right thing to do. Your family would be better for it.

I don't even shed tears at funerals. So, guess I can't relate to your pain right now. However, after the initial Shock, the Grieving period... I truly hope you'll come to accept/face the harsh Reality and Brace/Deal with it [as I'm sure you would be more capable than I am--to actual do something rather than just think/talk].

Obama was raised by a single Mom [who died young]. And look where he is right now. There are lots of families that never lose any member [to tragedy]... but you and I don't care much for them at all, right?

Again, my condolences to your loss. But I hope you'll be strong enough to accept what had happened and move on with what you have--not just getting by [and still grieving everyday], but be as happy as you can, and make the best of it as you could [raising your living children].

Best wishes.

[Do Do]

To all those who just found out about MC's tragedy,

If you had no ideas what took place, please spend a little more time to read [in here or whereelse] or ask around [PMing someone you know] to find out for yourself, if you're curious what happened to MC's small family.

But please stop asking MC [directly] "what happened to her son".

We've been through that already!!!!! And I [and most of her friends] would like her to forget "what happened" and move on with her life.

Noble and caring as your intention might be, the result/effect would still be rude and negative to her well-being.

Sorry if I offended you guys. But I am really p!ssoff and can't stand another person who came out from no where starting asking "what happened to your son", again.

Peace!!!!